By Amy and Marie
Remus took Amanda’s hand as they left the small restaurant and placed it in the crook of his arm. “I’ll walk you home,” he said quietly.
“Alright,” she said, just as quietly.
Remus had to fight to hold back his sigh of defeat. He had the sinking feeling he knew why dinner with Amanda had been so different than how he’d imagined it would be. He fully expected the dinner to be frequently punctuated by her infectious and amusing laughter. She seemed to regard him differently now, and as much as he didn’t want to ask her about it, he knew he had to.
He waited at least until they were surrounded by the din of the bustling people in the Hogsmeade high street. “What’s wrong, Amanda? Something’s bothering you.”
She waited a moment or two before answering. This was such a delicate matter. “Nothing’s wrong, Remus. Not really, anyway. Just different. At least...I think so.” Who was she kidding. It was definitely different now. Finding out that the the person you’ve admired for so long, perhaps even loved, who had finally asked you to dinner... Well, to have an owl deliver news on the morning of the dinner that your date was, in fact, a werewolf, was definitely not normal, and it certainly complicated things.
“Oh,” Amanda brightened, “I forgot to ask about your sister. How is she?”
“Maggie’s Maggie, as always,” Remus laughed. “She sent me an owl a day or two ago...”
She really couldn’t believe it. Remus Lupin, diligent, honest worker, always one of the smart students in school, nice and well-liked, and a werewolf? It was impossible except for the fact that she could recall that Remus was always missing once a month. But it seemed so contradictory. She really had been trying to wrap her head around it all day.
Remus stopped talking about his sister, realizing that Amanda really
was completely oblivious to the conversation. Just as she hadn't been
listening during dinner. "Amanda," Remus said stopping on the sidewalk.
Amanda kept walking, not realizing that Remus had stopped, until she felt the tug on her arm which was still hooked into his.
"Remus, what's wrong? Why did you stop?" she asked confused.
Remus pulled Amanda off into the alley next to the street, wrapped his arms around her and quickly Apparated them to her front door.
"Goodnight Amanda," he said as he turned to walk back down the path.
"Wait, no, Remus! Why?"
Remus turned around and studied her for a moment. She had a look of utter confusion plastered on her face. He couldn't help but smile. She had been in her own little world the entire night and truly hadn't noticed that it had upset him in the slightest. He walked back up the steps to her house. Perhaps they could settle this tonight.
"Lets go in and talk," he said reassuringly.
Amanda simply nodded as she unwarded her front door. She led the way into her front sitting room. She sat on the couch as Remus situated herself in the chair.
"What's wrong Remus?"
"Funny, that's the same question I was going to ask you."
"Wha-what do you mean?" her voice faltered. She knew she had been allusive all night and she hadn't meant to be such a bad companion on their first date, but she couldn't shake the thought of that owl from her head.
"You've been inside your own thoughts all night. I asked out a vibrant, energetic, fun woman and I went out with a quiet, sullen woman. What happened in between the time I asked you out and when I picked you up tonight?"
Amanda's eyes went to her hands clasped in her lap. She couldn't bear to look at the man sitting across from her. She knew he was still the Remus Lupin she had had her first crush on at school. He was still the same person he was when he had asked her to go to dinner with him and she had accepted.
"I'm sorry, Remus. I .. I don't know what is wrong with me tonight. I just, I've got some things on my mind."
"What is it? You've never kept anything from me before." Remus reached across and took Amanda's hands between his own.
"I ..." she sighed, not knowing how to continue. She knew she needed to simply tell him about the owl and how it really didn't matter to her that he was a werewolf. She sighed audibly. She couldn't even convince herself of that fact. How was she ever going to convince him? Remus withdrew his hands from hers.
"You've found out. I'll just go," he said quietly. He stood slowly and started to make his way to the door when he heard Amanda behind him, crying. He kept walking. She hadn't called him back and he was not going to impose himself on her any longer than necessary.
"Re-Remus," she stuttered. "I'm sorry. Its just that," Amanda sighed. She jerked her head up, finding confidence from somewhere deep inside her. "Why didn't you tell me Remus? I had to find out from some bloody owl post! I don't even know who sent it."
Remus whirled around, "Don't try and turn this back around on me Amanda. You are the one who has been silent all night, ashamed to be seen with a werewolf." Amanda blanched at the word. "Yes, I said it. I am a werewolf."
"I never said I was ashamed to be seen with you Remus. You inferred that on your own."
"It wasn't a hard conclusion to come to. You've been silent all night, barely even answering my questions. This is hardly how I envisioned our first date."
"Come sit down," she told him.
"You stupid, stubborn man. Come sit down."
Remus did as he was bid and sat back down in the chair he had previously occupied, but he didn’t say anything for a long time, he merely watched Amanda.
Finally her eyes flickered over to meet his. “Just...sit with me for a while?” Amanda asked, a note of hope and a silent plea in her voice. “I just need to collect everything and put it all back together.”
“I guess I can’t blame you,” Remus conceded. In her eyes he could see the desire she had to accept him. She was trying, and honestly, he appreciated that. So many people simply discarded them when they found out. He could be patient and understanding since she was willing to do the same for him.
“How long have you been...?” she trailed off, unable to finish the sentence.
“Before Hogwarts, when I was really young.”
“Oh, Remus, I can’t even imagine,” Amanda said. “But then I suppose you’ve always been you. I just didn’t know.”
Remus patiently sat with her for a long time. He didn’t know what to say, and he figured it still was just a process of thinking for her. Finally, she reached for his hand and pulled him from his chair, indicating that she wanted him to sit by her on the sofa. Remus acquiesced and put an arm around her.
“Is that why you waited so long to ask me to dinner?” she asked, a smirk on her face.
This. This was his Amanda again. At least he hoped to call her his Amanda.
“Perhaps,” he admitted. Then he tested to see if he could call her his. A simple experiment of leaning in to capture her lips with his.
*huggles Amanda* I'm glad you liked it dear! I loved helping Mar write it for you! Hope you had a wonderful birthday!